Looking backward, I had been teaching as an official teacher for the past 6 months. How am I dealing with the work? How well I am performing? Did I manage? There had been so many uncertainly in dealing with my jobs. There is so many insecurities that I felt. I had been thinking.
For the past six months, I had been trying to cope with my jobs. Jobs meant teaching, paper works, school activities and additional activities to me.
Let’s see. Teaching had been not going well. My pupils seemed to score average as they used to be. Though there is some improvement after the exam had been make easier, and some pupils seemed to did better after adding more variant questions in exam while some did badly than ever. In term of homework, it is horrible. I always get only half of the entire class homework and some was not done. While some just to complete it with nonsensical answer.
Classroom management is like going into a roller coaster with full up and downs. Today they are ok, next day it was horrible. There are some considerable changes I term of using grouping by giving marks based on their group performance. Hence, there is some peer pressure and peer guidance. It seemed to work slightly better. As overall, some pupils know I am not so firm, so they bravely fool around. I know it is my fault to begin with. I really need to be more firm and present myself in a more appropriate way than having a happy face and happy tone. My pupils seemed to be playing with me.
Activities are usual. The pupils seemed to be learning but some aren’t. They just lost in the fun of activities or they are totally disengaged. I really need to manage the things better.
Back to back I felt the worst in managing myself. I seemed to be hopelessly forgetful, having a bad time managing my emotion and frustration. If you are a bad self manager, don’t expect you will manage other things well. I had been in bad pessimistic mood. Please
teach me to manage myself.
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